So we begin by breaking "converse law" (apparently) by lacing the bottom eyelets under rather then over the sneaker. I then lift the tongue over the lace to hide the bottom bar.
Always awkward - the first kiss. Take both laces and cross them over each other before threading over the sneaker and back in through the second eyelets.
The second kiss - Cross the laces and tread them under the sneaker, and out through the third eyelets.
For the third kiss, cross the laces (again), and thread them over the sneaker and back in through the fifth eyelets.
Forth kiss, much like the second... Keep going lover boy (or girl)...
Kiss number five, simply copy step two. If you made it this far, then you must be doing something right!
Finally, tidy up by bringing each lace straight up to the top eyelets.
Follow the exact steps for the other sneaker...
Ready to kiss some ass... (see what I did there?)