We have to prep this bad boy. I don't know why it's a bad boy doesn't matter. Anyway this is what mine is like. I'm guessing yours looks similar so let's make it unique. Met a girl named Uniqua once.
Sand the varnish off. Lightly if it's veneer. I use a manual sander because I'm a Man so I look like I'm doing more work, plus an electric might ruin it. Do this outside unless your into dusty stuff.
Sanding, sanding, sanding - oh yeah feel the burn... (Switch hands) ...Sand that mother! That's right who's the Boss? It ain't Tony Danza, fool. I'm the boss (Switch hands) WTH? I'm still sanding.
Did I even do anything? Crap! For real?! Might have to sand some more. No I will not use the electric sander because it's a sign of weakness and it makes me feel funny and tinglely and numb and weird.
Wipe the dust off. That's right it's a sock. Good job glad you noticed, you have wonderful attention to detail. I don't even like that sock anymore it slips off when I walk. That's called karma.
I'm whitewashing mine you can use any color-I don't discriminate. Thin paint w/water to see more wood grain. That's how I roll. You don't have to do this you can go plain coat, if that's how you roll.
Since we sanded, the wood will absorb the paint especially the whitewash. You'll probably have to do more than one coat. I know you're ready to do the design, just chill. Doing it right ain't easy.
Painting. Painting...This is when you crank up the music open up your beverage of choice and annoy the neighbors. They will look at you funny but secretly wish they were as awesome as you and me.
Holy crap more friggin paint. Forgot to mention put paper down so you don't paint your table. Personally I'm cool with it. It adds character but life is better when my wife is not mad at me.
This is custom. If you're a fan of some other local sports team or college you can do that. I'll never judge you. I'm a pretty cool guy like that. You can do the Mona Lisa or the happy poo emodicon.
Did two. Had to draw it bigger to fit. I can draw, no biggie. Maybe harder if you can't, but hey be a man and be confident. If you're a girl, you can be the man too, I've seen it.
Take the graphite out of the pencil. Old folks called it lead. Pretty awesome right? Find the crease and gently split it apart. Be careful don't cut your fingers off. Fingers look better attached.
On the back of your designs rub the graphite all over it make sure it's dark, like real dark. Like "I'm getting this crap everywhere" Dark. Don't be scared. There are scarier things to be scared of.
We're making a carbon copy. Remember carbon copies underneath checks so you could see what you wrote but then you never knew how many checks you had left and you go to pay your bills and be like-DANG!
Ran out of the other lead. Ok I called it lead so what?! Oh and now I'm using a pencil?! Why'd you risk injury earlier cutting that stupid pencil apart? What if my kids see this? What a jerk I am.
Get your design where you want it. Make sure it's straight. Sometimes doors to the box don't line up. Probably because it was made in China and shipped overseas, then to walmart and then I dropped it.
Start tracing. Press firmly. Try not to rest your hand on the paper. You may rub the pencil stuff onto your board as you drag your heavy hand down it. Bet you knew that already cause you is smartieer.
Tracing the other one too. Apparently I held my breath while doing this. Try not to do that. Breathing helps with blood flow and living.
Take off your paper and look at how awesome you are. If it looks light in some areas go back over it directly. Remember where to paint in the lines. You've done so much work, so don't screw it up!
When you remove the paper you'll see your "carbon copy". Pretty sweet right? How's yours look? Cool, I didn't know you were a fan of that one team. They had that one guy he was so good that one year.
I'm colorblind and I have to get help matching my colors. Blue is not purple and pink is not lime green. That's our motto at my red-green colorblind support group. They've help me accept who I am.
Paint by numbers member that? Oh you thought they were fun. I'm colorblind, so yeah. Once this dries I lightly sand it so it looks old school cause I'm an old fool who's so cool. Whoomp there it is!
Hang it up good, don't drop it on you foot and cuss in front of your kids like did. Bullseye is eye level for anyone 6foot tall. I don't know google it, you want me to do everything for you?! Geeze.
Did this one for my Brother-in-law. Bevo. Looks pretty tight right? Do people still say that? I hope not. Anyway attach a pic in the comments if you end up doing one of these. Or don't, I'll move on.
Start shooting! It's more fun with friends but at this point who really cares. No I don't know how far away to be. Google it. I know you have a smart phone because you're always on it. Anywho adios.