DISCLAIMER: This is an intense workout! Always consult a physician before attempting any new exercise plan. This is a guide. I am not a trainer. I am not responsible for any injury caused. Warm Up.
Targeted weight loss is false, so this total body routine focuses on max calorie burn, using core strength moves. Be prepared to sweat. Start with a gentle warm up for 3 minutes, stretch, then begin.
Vicious circles. Do 10 each direction. Hands should be further forward than your hips. Seems easy enough so far.
Weighted uppercuts, do 80. Make sure you dip slightly before punching upward and diagonally across your body, causing you to twist each time. Very light weights, I'm using Roma tomatoes. Mamma mia!
Plank walk for 1 minute. Forward 3 steps, to the side for three and back again. Try and keep your butt low and walk with your toes. You've got caveman strength in those toes. Now is the time to use it
10 Turtles. Quickly lay down and spread the arms and legs wide, don't let your feet or hands touch the ground. Sit up, pulling your knees in. Stand up and star jump. Skyrim shout at the top optional.
Take a 30 second water break whenever you require one. Usually every 4 moves is fine.
Standing heel or toe touches. 40 reps. keep your back as straight as possible and alternate with each repetition. Chuck Norris does these, in his sleep.
Newton Sit ups. X10+. Try to absorb the energy (mxgxh) of the falling mass where G is 6.67x10^-11. It'll fall at 9.8 m/s^2 [down] with a force of Gm1m2/r^2. Too easy? On Jupiter it's much harder.
Bicycles. 20 one direction, 20 reversed. Put your hands down on the floor either side of your hips if you're finding it too hard.
Core twist. X40-50*. Count a rep once both knees have come up. Don't pull on your head, just twist from the waist without bending over. *It's 80-100 but I'm calling it 40-50 because I'm a sick person.
Weighted knee raises. Do as many as you can, but no more than 20. If you can do 20 then you probably live in a low gravity environment like the ISS, or it's time to up your weight.
Back down to earth. High knee twist for 45 seconds. Keep tight and controlled but move as quickly as you can. Check it out, it's a DOUBLE fist-pump.
Lumberjack Jumps. 16-20 total. Swing the ball/weight from the other shoulder, over the bent knee like an axe to a sapling. Switch sides after the first 8-10 reps.
Vertical crunches x20. Keep the legs straight and the heels high, avoid pointing the toes. Reaching for the toes is easier than straight up.
Plank to Plyo. Slowly lower the chest to the floor from plank position (take 5 seconds to lower yourself), then do 5 plyometric (jumping), clapping, or regular push ups. Repeat x 4. No jokes.
Oblique ball crunches. 15-20 per side, brace your feet against something. Hold for 2 seconds at the top.
Ball Walk. TAKE EXTRA CARE HERE. Control the movements and don't over extend your wrists. Move around for 1 minute. If you can only go back and forth a short distance, then just do that.
Next day delivery. 10 each side, move quickly, and tighten your core. Use a moderate/light weight (a 10lb medicine ball is what I've got here, as usual). Soon you'll be using planets.
Final challenge: this last step is hard. Be brave but not stupid. 30 high knee twists then 15s plank, 30 High Knee Twists, 15 plank runs, 30 High knee twists, 10 low plank runs. X2-3
You're done. You should be sweating like a turkey at Christmas. Walk around for a few minutes, then see my guide on stretching.
One of the keys to improving my fitness has been variety. Creating unpredictable conditions means more adaptation. Don't do this every day, mix it up with strength training, swimming, running...
Remember to eat properly or most of this will be in vain. Make sure you get enough sleep, and take 2 days off from training each week.
If you enjoyed this guide, you are a sick person, but check out my other exercise blasts. If you try this or any of my other guides, please leave a comment about your experience.